I bought a bikini! 
Now…I didn’t say that I was going to wear it, but the mere fact that I bought it speaks VOLUMES!
I was trying to recall a time when I wore one of these suckers, and I think I can remember wearing one maybe twice! Even back in the day when I SHOULD have been able to wear one with confidence, I just didn’t. I’ve always been a pretty self-conscious person, so it’s just never been in my comfort zone. BUT, I’m envious of people who are so self-assured, no matter what their body looks like, that they can step out confidently in whatever what they wear!
Adding to my negative body image and lack of self-confidence, I’ve had 4 C-sections 2 of which went TERRIBLY wrong and left me with really gnarly scars! I’m extremely self-conscious and hyper-aware of one in particular, and it bothers me to no end. I dread the thought of anyone seeing it. 🙁 Now…if you look back through some of the before/after pictures, you will see what I’m talking about. It runs down vertically from my belly button. The inside of that scar adhered itself to my abdominal wall, leaving two bulges on the sides. No matter how much belly fat I lose, it’ll always look like this. 🙁 My dear sweet children tell me that it looks like a “butt”. I can’t believe I’m even writing that sentence down to be read by anyone and everyone. We all have our “issues” right? Well, this is mine. But maybe it’s like a Band-Aid? Maybe I just need to rip it off, let the world see what’s underneath, and get over it!
My confidence is building, each and every day. I’m getting close to feeling like I could do it! I’m talking myself into not caring if anyone notices my flaws and/or scars. This health and fitness journey has been very empowering for me, and has boosted my self-esteem more than any time I can remember! More important than losing weight and building muscle is the fact that I’m building my confidence. When you become more confident, you are just more comfortable in your own skin. When you’re comfortable, you’re happy. And when you’re happy…anything is possible. You can do anything! You might even wear a bikini. 🙂
*Want to start you own health and fitness journey. Join my next 30 day challenge! Want more information? Click “30 Day Challenge” at the top of this page.
